Right now, he's blocking the aisles in trader Joe's picking up the food and checking every label
Right now, he's waiting six hours till he lets me put any dairy on the table,
Right now, he's pulling out a light box just to check my lettuce for bugs and little insects,
I can't object, but
It truly puts me at a loss to be
Dealing with this meshugas,
He never wants to eat up my baked treats,
He heard at Sinai Moses say
That he won't accept tablet k
Maybe next time he'll think before he eats
Right now, he's probably pulling out a
Torah just to read vayikra and dvarim,
Right now, he's probably saying “that's treif”,
And I'm a thinking that it's getting extreme,
Right now, he's probably surfing on
chabad.org to find proper hechshers,
I can't stand his lectures, oh…
I sure won't the question the divine
But I'm telling you this guest of mine
Is making me regret we'd ever meet
To feed this member of the tribe,
Drives me mad I can't describe,
Maybe next time he'll think before he eats
I might have saved a little chullent for his next host,
Cause the next time that he eats
It won't be by me
Oh no, not by me
Through mezonot and shehakol
He always seems to know it all
From artichoke to all the kosher meats
It started with a milk and kid,
But so much more do we forbid
Maybe next time he'll think before he eats
Maybe next time he'll think before he eats